Frisk and the Angry Houseplant
by Titans R Us
Summary: When Frisk sacrificed everything so that everyone could have their happy ending, they meant everyone. Including one very upset houseplant kicking and screaming the entire way. But that's okay. They have a plan.
1. There is a Plan

You have a plan.

To be frank you've tired. Tired from people saying you can't.

Not when you died repeatedly to understand every monster so you could spare it.

Not when you spared the person people expected you to kill. Undyne. Asgore. Flowey.

Not when you reset and changed the timeline over and over just so everyone could have their happy ending.

And everyone is going to have that happy ending.

 **Everyone.**

The thought makes you more DETERMINED than ever. 

So when Toriel tells you to go on a walk as a final underground farewell.

 _You go on a walk._

Pass Hotland streaming full, gears clicking in place.

Pass Waterfall glistening despite the trash. You fumble in the garage until you find something that could work. Littered here and there the echo flowers whisper how their wishes came true.

Pass Snowden, where monsters right and left excitedly make plans now that they have a future.

Pass the ruins, crumbling and barren. Pass Toriel's home, the puzzles that seem so childish now, looking right and to the left until they see...him.

Asriel.

Who stares at you in surprise. His expression twisting into a weak resigned smile.

He gives you small talk, warnings meant to throw you off and weak excuses when you tug at his arm. Currently he's too heavy to budge.

"Someone's got to take care of these flowers."

'But whose going to take care of you?' You sign back.

"Don't you have anything better to do?"

'No.' You stamp into the grass as his brow starts to furrow.

"Frisk...you have to go back."

'Not yet.' You argue viciously with your hands.

"Frisk I want you to remember me like this. I'm going to change back soon. I'm going to change back into...Flowey. I don't want you to...see me like that."

You shake your head. It doesn't matter to you what he looks like or if he's lost a heart.

He matters. And you never save anyone halfway.

So you sit down beside him and wait.

Wait until he stops trying to reason with you and yells instead.

Waits until he burns out with tears and starts to sulkily ignore you.

Waits until his back rests against yours, as if grateful that you're there. That he's not alone when he starts to shudder and quake.

Waits until the white fur quakes and curls into yellow.

Waits until his voice cracks, as it gets higher and distorted.

Waits until what's left is the first thing you saw when you fell.

Small, snarling vicious Flowey.

"Did you have _fun_ watching me into this, Frisk?" He spits in your direction. "Maybe you just like to see me _**suffer**_."

From your pack you pull out the object you found at the dump.

"A...shoe? _Oh, excuse me_ maybe you get a **kick** out of this instead. You pathetic, over-sympathetic, stupid WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

The soil around Flowey is surprisingly soft as it gets under your nails. You have to act quickly before he realizes your intentions...and runs away.

"STOP! STOP FRISK! DON'T TOUCH ME, DON'T TOUCH ME WHEN I'M LIKE THIS, ARGHH..."

The sting is sharp. Huh, you've never been bit by a flower before, but there's a first time for everything. You'll put a Band-Aid on it later. Right now though you smile at the squirming mess that's trying to escape your fingers. He fits perfectly in the boot you brought but he'll need a proper pot soon.

"Oh. _Ohhhhhh_ I see now, **Ha!** " His bitter laughter rings as you quickly fill the space around him. "You're _sooooo_ selfish, Frisk. Let me guess, we're just going to walk out of the underground into the sunlight and with the rest those **idiots** we'll be one big happy family, _right?_ "

Yep. You sign and pick him up.

" **DING-DONG, YOU'RE WRONG!** IT'LL NEVER WORK. I DON'T CARE HOW MUCH 'DETERMINATION' YOU HAVE..." Flowey screams a rant that lasts until Hotland. You don't bother arguing back.

Your hands are full.

And besides, its easier being bombarded with hissing words than 'friendliness' pellets.

"You're horrible, Frisk." Oh look, someone's running out of stream. "You're... **horrible**. Why are you doing this? _Why?_ " He buries his petals into your chest and you hold the boot tighter.

"I-I don't understand. _I d-don't..._ _ **Frisk**_ _._ "

You shift Flowey to get a free hand and clumsily spell, 'I'm not leaving...without you."

" _Urgh,_ you're hopeless...so hopeless." He groans and your shirt starts to feel wet. Even as a flower, Asriel is still a crybaby.

Up head your friends, no. Your family stands and chatters, clearly waiting for you. It's been hours but Papyrus shouts joyfully when he spots you across the way. _**"HUMAN! SANS AND THE KING-CLONE THAT IS NOT THE KING ARE...ARE MAKING GOAT-EYES AT EACH OTHER! MAKE THEM STOP!"**_

You think about what Alphys can do when she's confident. You wonder if Flowey or Asriel really lost their soul. And if they did, you wonder about your soul and if you could share it.

Toriel puts a paw on your shoulder and starts to question about your load. Flowey growls but your smile just gets brighter and brighter.

Everything is going to be okay, _you're sure of it_.

The endless possibilities fill you with **DETERMINATION.**

* * *

 **Notes:** One of the most frustrating parts of the game is how with the pacifist ending you can't really save Asriel/Flowey. He chooses to stay behind to take care of the flowers and it irritates you immensely. You did not survive both seizure-warning nightmare Flowey and Hyperdeath Asriel just for this goatboy to be miserable in the underground. So taking some inspiration from one of my favorite undertale comics post/131157670829/i-dunno-if-this-would-count-as-an-au-or-not-but I changed it. I'm really debating making a drabble series of the daily life of Frisk and the Angry Houseplant...but I'm not sure...and yes I know the spacing it still awkward, AGRH.


	2. No Demonic Houseplants at School, Frisk!

Flowey is not allowed at school anymore.

They had done a trial run of him as a class pet/plant thing. It did not end well.

Even when you were the best botanist in class! No one could check his water like you could. Then again, it's not like anyone else could get close enough to try.

Also Toriel says that 'biting' is not an acceptable way to solve problems.

Flowey vehemently disagrees. And says that they deserved it.

Well, don't tell Toriel but in this case he's not exactly…wrong?

Starting school again had been weird. You could solve puzzles left and right, but couldn't find your way out of a math paper bag. Toriel had made it easier; she really was a great teacher.

She had bought and founded the school. After all, Monster never lost their gold standard.

She knew what accommodations you needed and understood that you weren't stupid.

She designed a perfect curriculum for both monsters and humans.

In fact, she practically headed the Peaceful Relations Movement for the two races. Even divorced, Queen Toriel was a model of diplomacy for her people both in and out of the classroom.

But she couldn't force humans to like monsters.

She couldn't force humans to like other humans.

She couldn't force the other kids to like...you.

You had forgotten what this was like.

Monsters communicate in so ways, for instance you had become quite proficient in Wiggle. But humans...humans like to focus on the one with their mouths.

The one you can't do.

 _"What's wrong with you?"_ Toriel had explained, but it seems like only half the class had listened. And some of them wanted to watch you fumble with paper and pen.

 _"Urgh, I don't understand 'hand-speak,' why can you just talk like everyone else."_ You didn't ask to be this way.

 _"Ummm, don't invite them, they're kind of weird you know?"_ You didn't ask to be 'broken.'

 _"Oh, it's_ _ **your**_ _ **fault**_ _all the monsters are here."_ Toriel had tried to weed out students that were raised 'questionably.'

 _"You're another gross_ _ **monster-lover**_ _."_ Most of the time she would catch students in the act and expel them. But sometimes, sometimes Toriel would miss them...like this one.

 _"Maybe that's why you don't have any real parents...only a monster could want you."_ If only you could dodge words like you can attacks.

 _"Maybe when they realize how stupid you are..._ _ **they won't want you either!**_ _"_ Saliva scratches down your throat as you swallow the silent wail pushing out.

You know that...Toriel loves you, you know she does! But...Toriel has loved every child that fell in the ruins. Toriel fed them all pie. Toriel gave them all a place to stay. Toriel had loved them all.

Would she still love you...if you hadn't fallen that day? After all there had been six others before you; you weren't anything special. If she met you outside of Mt. Ebott, met ordinary, voiceless, clumsy Frisk would she...care?

" **HA HA,** WELL AT LEAST FRISK WAS **PICKED** BY THEIR FAMILY, YOUR SORRY PARENTS ARE **STUCK** WITH YOU!"

Flowey had gotten out of his pot again. When he first realized that he could do that, it took everyone three hours to find him. Frisk had managed to convince him to be put back, but now and then...

 _"What did you say PLANT FREAK?"_

"I SAID YOUR PARENTS REGRET YOUR EXISTENCE, IDIOT!"

 _"YOU'RE JUST A STUPID WEED!"_

"YOU'RE JUST A STUPID CHILD!

 _"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"_

"OH, I WISH IT STILL **WAS** A WORLD OF KILL OR BE KILLED!"

 _"AGRH, DID YOU JUST_ _ **BITE**_ _ME?"_

"YES AND YOU TASTE HORRIBLE!"

" _W-WHY YOU! I'LL TEAR OFF YOUR PETALS!"_

"THAT'S RIGHT! COME OVER HERE SO I CAN **STRANGLE** YOU!"

When Toriel finds them, you've barely been able to pin down Flowey as the other student screams out slurs that make the other monster _gasp_. Flowey growls and twists his vines over your arms but freezes at Toriel's face.

Toriel is not happy.

The air is still and you feel your skin prickle with static. You think if this weren't at school, there would be pile of burnt ash in front of you. Toriel takes a deep breath and hisses it out slowly. _**"What. Is. Going. On. Here?"**_

The class is speechless; no one wants that gaze directly on them.

" _ **Frisk, Dear?"**_

Your hands shake as you try to defuse the situation.

" **Oh,** _ **really?**_ **"**

" _THEY'RE LYING! BUT OF COURSE YOU'LL TAKE THEIR SIDE, YOU G-GOAT HAG!"_

"FRISK, here was telling me that **YOU** said something you didn't mean to and **FLOWEY** took it the wrong way."

" _W-well, I-I. "_

"But there's more to that, _isn't there?_ " A beatific smile spreads on Toriel's face and terror strikes all that look upon that face. "Please, follow me to the office… _ **now**_."

Toriel really is a great teacher.

* * *

Later you're truly happy that Flowey is now a permanent edition to the household. Things have become more 'lively.'

"Frisk love, I think plants thrive on sunshine and water."

"I want the pie."

"We don't know how human or monster food could affect him."

"GIVE ME THE PIE."

"Now, now Flowey there's no need to be rude."

"GIVE ME THE **BLEATING** PIE!" Apparently Flowey still remembers some bad words in goat. You hope Flowey will teach you what they mean.

"Oh. My. Word, where did you **HEAR** such foul language! Come here so I can wash your maw with soap."

"NO. I DIDN'T MEAN IT. I-I'M SORRY. NOT THE ORGANIC PLANT WASH!"

At night, you set Flowey on the windowsill next to the bed. The covers are cold, but will warm up soon. You're almost dreaming when Flowey whispers, "You're only s-stupid if you take that idiot seriously."

You sit up slowly and he jerks back. Huh, you guess he really hoped that you _were_ sleeping

"But, you know...you're the only one that made Toriel want to destroy the door for. Y-you're the only one she wanted to keep."

The tight spot in your chest finally loosens. You reach over, clutching at Flowey's pot and mouth something. Over and over.

"S-stop that. You better not cry on me. I'm a freshwater plant, not a salty one. I said stop it! I'm not going to say 'You're welcome' or anything just because I admitted you're the favorite. Frisk. _Frisk!_ "

But the damage is done. You feel a lot better now. And somehow even as a sarcastic bloodthirsty flower, he's learned how to be...a pretty good brother.

The best you could ever hope for.

* * *

 **Notes:** I swear it's only because of your guys' reviews that made this chapter happen. I don't quite know where to go with this so if you would like more, I'd love to hear some more ideas for scenarios. But I admit I had a lot of fun hashing the pie scene out. I tried hard to handle the bullying situation carefully, but I'm sorry if I fumbled a bit. Overall I wanted a kind of protective-while-not-admitting-to-be-protective Flowey feel. In the future when they're much older…I possibly 'could' ship Frisk and Asriel together, but it might be tricky to write it. Thanks for reading guys!


	3. Never Let That Fish into the Kitchen

There is a list.

An honest to goodness list that Toriel created of those allowed to watch Flowey while you and Toriel are at school. It's based on the amount of property damage and mental abuse that ensues with each poor soul you managed to _"persuade"_ to do it. Your puppy eyes have no equal. Though to be fair Papyrus does come close.

The list is **very** short.

You've tried almost everyone you know, but the moment Toriel steps through the door to assess the caretaker's result...well there's a reason why it's her that decides whose on the list.

You don't quite know what goes on when you're away, but you hope that you'll stop having to move soon. The house is on fire... _again_.

They really have to cross out Undyne's name.

* * *

It's not EVEN HER FAULT, it's the WEAK APPLIANCES that TORIEL surrounds herself with.

Undyne has LEARNED that for the best cooking you need the STRONGEST MATERIALS. Even ALPHYS has learned and at home she's made sure they only have the MOST FIREPROOF, WATERPROOF, STAB-RESISTANT environment possible. Alphys understands how PASSIONATE Undyne can be.

So it's NOT HER FAULT that Toriel has such an INADEQUATE kitchen.

She was only trying to feed that stupid flower. The one that talks too much and THAT LITTLE "IT" LOVES TO PISS HER OFF. Undyne misses swearing, but she has already lost 50 gold to Toriel's ACCURSED swear jar. Frisk is definitely old enough to hear some "adult" language. Toriel disagrees and Undyne never knew how COLD a disappointing stare could be. But then again no one in the kingdom doubts who wears the **pants** in the monarchy.

Undyne had tried to just water the plant, but the THING only hissed and it's in a pot HOW COULD IT DODGE?

But Undyne had promised Frisk that she would take care of Flowey and she NEVER does anything HALF...BAKED!

Flowey rather likes this cooking style.

He didn't expect that his reasonable griping would yield such a delicious outcome. He had been skeptical when Undyne put him on the counter demanding that if he wants GOOD food then they'll have to MAKE it.

Smashing vegetables has never been so cathartic.

The stains spattered on the wall reach up to the ceiling in lovely hues of red, purple, green and grainy pink. Undyne is trying to branch out by putting meat and other HEALTHY things in her pasta. The counter is unfortunately destroyed though.

Much later, Flowey does admit to a hovering disappointed-you-should've-known-better Frisk that things escalated a bit.

 **"STIR HARDER, YOU PATHETIC EXCUSE OF A FISH!"**

 ** _"I AM, YOU STUPID DANDELION! WHY DON'T YOU TAKE OVER?"_**

 **"I DON'T HAVE HANDS, IDIOT!"**

 ** _"THAT'S NO EXCUSE!"_**

Yet, Flowey restates that he should have been apart of the decision to choose their abode. HE would have NEVER picked a kitchen with gas burners.

 **"SHOULD WE TURN IT HIGHER?"**

 ** _"YEAH!"_**

 **"HOTTER?"**

 ** _"LET IT BURN, BABY!"_**

Flowey and Undyne still think that the pasta would have been exquisite if they managed to get it out of the burning building in time. They had rushed to throw most of Frisk's and Toriel's belongings out on the lawn when the kitchen had become _"unrecoverable."_ Because most of the stuff-stuff is barely smoked damaged, Undyne declares that this was her best cooking session yet!

Alphys apologizes to Toriel over and over.

"No. No, it's all right Alphys. I should have known. **_I should have known_** _."_

After all, Flowey is not the only one who needs a caretaker.

* * *

Notes: Writing Undyne is very fun and very loud. I'm sorry. I've had this in my files for forever. But I can't get the next part going. Eventually I'd like to do all the characters and next up is Sans and Papyrus. But San is being a jerk. He doesn't want to be written. What a fruitcake. Hope you enjoy the fic!


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